Lean In; Sometimes it is the best option, to just, Lean In.

As a full-time mother and employer, I found this book is inspiring. It reminds me that we are all humans, and no matter how hard we try, social expectation is the worst judge. So just stop being dull with it.

Here are three things that frequently apply to my situation:

1. No one has it all.

Just when I thought I had it all, Sandberg reminds me in her book that "no matter what any of us has and how grateful we are for what we have, no one has it all," because that very rhetoric goes against the basis of every economic relationship: the idea of trade-offs. As humans, we are dealing with constrained optimization in our lives because we have this limited and scarce resource called time. With that tiny amount of resources, we are attempting to maximize our utility based on parameters like career, kids, relationship, me-time, healing, etc.

When people said to me, "Oh my god, you are lucky to have a job where you can work from anywhere while taking care of your kid," I said yes, I am very blissful about that, but believe me, I worked my ass off to be where i am right now. I chose to be in this position, and that means I made sacrifices, even when i worked from home. Like, for letting my son take a bath at 7 or 8 pm because i had a packed meeting, or I could not stop my son from playing in a dirty fish pool under the rain because I had things to do, and if i had stopped him, i would have needed to accompany him, but i could not.

For this matter, Sandberg suggests that trying to do it all and expecting the result to be 100% perfect is the ticket to disappointment. So just focus on what's important at the moment. For example, I’ve been spending months finding the excellent school for my son. And there is this one perfect school where I really wish my son could enroll. But it's about 8 kilometers from my house, which is as far as I can see. The farther I am from school, the earlier I must wake up and prepare everything, and this will consume my morning routine working hour, not to mention dealing with traffic, having less time to work, and so on. So in the end, we just went to the closer school, which was less appealing to me but made sense for the trade-off. Being a parent means making adjustments, and compromising every second. So yes, sometimes done is better than perfect.

2. Equality means the right to choose our own way

Equality will be achieved only when more women rise to the top of every government and every industry. I’m not sure I would be 100 percent in agreement with her. In the place where I’ve grown up, I could see that equality could be just as simple as when women have the choice to work or do anything inside or outside the home. Simply doing what she desires, and having the right to make decisions for herself is progress. We can encourage and inspire women to take on leadership roles, but we should not give the impression that those who sit at the table with a career are superior. Because what’s the point of being on the leadership ladder when it’s not actually what she aspires to be?.

I do agree when Sherryl stated that women don't really have a choice until they have partners who share parenting duties, supportive employers and coworkers, and. Men need to recognize that their contribution in the domestic area is needed. Equal opportunity does not exist unless everyone is given the support necessary to take advantage of those opportunities. So let us freely choose without fear of social stigma or judgment.

3. Less jealous and the world would be better

Some moms who work in the office every day wish they could resign and do business of their own and be with the kids. Others who are in the opposite situation would like to work in a company. This is as Joan Williams mentions an "us vs them" crusade or "mommy war," and it really needs to be stopped because the problem itself arises from another clash of social ideas where the ideal worker is defined as someone who is always available for work while the ‘good mother’ is defined as someone who is always available for her children, when in fact it is not as simple as that.

Especially in this era of digital nomads, where some companies allow their employees to work from wherever they wish, the line itself is getting more blurry than ever before. Being respectful has always been the best thing we can be and demonstrate to others. Communicate with others without judging or dismissing them. Listen to their stories fully because we never know if maybe, just maybe, her current situation is not what she wished for. So, just with respect, the more women help each other, the more we help ourselves.